Self-sabotaging behaviour is typical.
Self-sabotaging behaviour is unique to humans. If we decide upon something we want, many of us may sabotage ourselves by doing all we can to ensure we don’t get it. Does it sound familiar? Even though this type of behaviour is unconscious, we can get it under control. You may be sabotaging yourself for many reasons. It’s a prevalent behaviour rooted in an unexplained fear. If you’ve lived most of your life in mediocrity, you may be terrified of being anything else. Ask yourself if your life is as fulfilled as you’d like it to be.
3 reasons why you may self-sabotage:
- Control. You may be self-sabotaging to gain control over your circumstances. Maintaining your current status is the simplest and most sure way to remain in charge.
- Putting everything you’ve got into something means the risk of becoming vulnerable. Fear begins to get the better of you, and you begin to sabotage yourself.
- Low self-worth. Do you feel unworthy of success?
- You may have agreed that, for whatever reason, happiness is always something beyond your control. However, this agreement is a self-limiting belief, becoming a continually evident prediction in your life.
- Excitement.
- You may continue to undermine your efforts because you’re looking for excitement. You may feel the need to live in a constant state of turmoil to divert you from painful memories or add some spice to your life.
If any of these examples reflect how you see yourself, don’t despair: there are steps you can take to put yourself on the path to self-mastery.
Choose to see yourself successful and embrace the good life you deserve, then refuse to talk yourself out of going for it.
Self-sabotaging and how to stop it
- First, become aware of your behaviour.
- Firstly, you need to become aware of yourself.
- Begin by creating a self-sabotaging journal. Then, make a journal entry every time you know you’ve sabotaged yourself. Describe the result, circumstances, and environment.
- Try not to over-analyse. Allow yourself to flow with the writing.
- More often than not, sincere intentions are often reflected in their reactions and not so much in their words.
- In your journal, aim to be an impersonal observer. Eventually, in some instances, you can gain a more in-depth understanding of your motives.
- Visualise your success.
- Remember, success is different for everyone; it’s neither black nor white. Create a habit of understanding what the meaning of success is for you. Continually remember how it feels to achieve it. Doing this regularly, you may find that your vision may change over time.
- Start seeing success as an integral part of your future, but recognise that difficulties will still occur. For example, you will always have to pay taxes and have relationship issues like everyone else.
- Release the idea of perfection.
- Do you still think that success equals perfection when you visualise the results? If that’s the case, it’s time to realise that no one is flawless.
- George Bernard Shaw would refer to this idea of perfection as “doublethink.” Perfection and life are mutually exclusive because it is impossible to achieve perfection. When you equate success with the impossible task of being perfect, your unconscious will prevent you from achieving success.
- Your unconscious mind is like a computer’s hard drive. It doesn’t know how to carry out a command like “do the impossible.”
- When you equate success with fear, your entire journey will be compromised and fought by your unconscious. Why? Because its primary purpose is to keep you safe, whether the threat is real or perceived.
Embrace the good life
Allow yourself to anticipate your success with excitement.
You may have been sending messages to your unconscious that are interpreted as, “Don’t grant me the opportunity to be successful!” So, let’s put your past habits of self-sabotage in the past. Choose to see yourself thriving and embrace the good life you deserve, then refuse to talk yourself out of going for it. The journey to your ideal life begins now!
External link: New World Encyclopaedia — https://www.newworldencyclopedia.org/entry/Sabotage
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